It may be a utopia to be able to feel happiness on a daily basis. But listen to this! According to the research, there are ways to influence so we can feel happier. Imagine if you could feel happy each morning you wake up. If you could have a feeling of joy and fulfilment every day? But how often do we actually feel this way? Of course, we all have days when we feel more or less down, but that is normal. What I mean is the feeling of joy and happiness you have when you wake up. You have your free days from work, knowing you can spend a whole day or two with your family, or the day you go on vacation or doing something you like the most to do, like your hobbies or being with your best friend or the big love in your life. Unfortunately, we don't feel this very often, at least not most people.
What makes so many people feel unhappy? Is it within ourselves, our attitude or our inability to cope with negative situations? Or is it external factors? Or both?
This reminds me of my childhood, and how effortless time this was. I remember the irreplaceable feeling of happiness when playing with friends. Time and space did not exist, just the feeling of happiness in what we did and total excitement. Is this happiness only a child can experience? Then comes adulthood, we have more responsibilities, pressure, and expectations, both internal and external. We have obligations, education, finding a job, supporting our family, and much joy but also worries and struggles.
What have researchers found about happiness?
Research has been ongoing about happiness over the past decade, and the researchers have found that happiness is more than a feeling. It is a condition in the brain, the heart and the cells of the body.
They have looked at what makes us healthy and happy. How happiness looks at different levels in our social life, how we express ourselves verbally when we communicate and also what happens in our happiness centre in the brain.
They could also see that people who focus too much on being happy on a daily basis feel that time is gone. They believe that the desire to feel happiness can certainly turn back negative. Say that you have a goal you want to achieve to be happy, then focus on the journey to the goal, not the goal in itself.
Anger, fear or negative feelings activate the sympathetic nervous system. This is the part of our nervous system that is activated when we are to escape from danger (fight and flight) If we do things that lower our heart rate, such as things that make us feel good, we activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which balances us. It makes us feel satisfied, calm, and harmonious. That system can push away the sympathetic system. Is it then possible to feel happier if we could learn and train ourselves to do things that stimulate this system?
The body creates feelings of happiness by releasing substances such as endorphins, serotonin, oxytocin, and dopamine. The body releases these substances when we do everyday things, such as moving, eating, sleeping, being with friends, laughing, etc. It is said that we can even fool the body by laughing even if we are not happy for the moment or have something to laugh at.
According to the research, it is possible to influence our sense of happiness differently.
- Having goals to strive for is very important. It causes us to want to move forward and develop. When we have a longing for our goal, we are motivated. But on the way to our goal, it is also important to be grateful for what we have to be able to feel happiness and by placing gratitude at the forefront every day. We must actively think about the things that make us grateful and give us a feeling of happiness. You can always find something to be grateful for, even when you feel down and depressed.
- Changing attitudes and your ways of thinking are key to enhancing the feeling of happiness. The brain has enormous plasticity, which means it can be changed and transformed throughout your life. For example, when a person has suffered a stroke or injury, the brain can find new paths, and the functions we lost can be re-trained. Similarly, we can train the brain regarding emotions and reactions.
- Daily routines, and changing our routines, and making them less good ones better. Find new habits that make us feel better. For example, reading a book before you sleep will probably give you a better night's sleep than looking at the TV or computer. Going to bed at the same time every day and waking up at the same time will be time give results.
- Stop focusing on the negative things in life. Turn that focus on what we experience positively and how we want things in life. Put up new goals, and work towards them. Stop telling yourself about what you don't have, for example.
- Stop focusing on things you cannot influence, it doesn't change anything, and it only gives you negative feelings. Focus on what you can do instead.
3 Exercise's how to feel more happiness
1. Write down three good things that
happened every day for five weeks. When we do that, we train the brain
to change focus to positive thinking. The brain is trained to look
for things that are good for us. One study showed that people felt
happier after this exercise than they did before.
2. Focus on what you enjoy doing. Put your energy into it and what you want. Only you yourself can decide how you want to think and what you want to focus on. "Where Your focus goes, your energy goes." Changing your attitude will make a big difference in how you feel.
3. Stop complaining, gossiping and being sarcastic. Every time you are to do any of these three things, stop yourself and try to find something that is positive instead or don't say anything at all. There is always something good in the bad. Find that, and focus on that instead. This will prevent you from activating your sympathetic nervous system (SNS) and instead activate the PNS.
How you can stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system:
By doing things that stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS), we stimulate the functions and signal substances that are good for us. For example, the immune system, which has more tasks than keeping us healthy, also ensures that our cells are renewed.
1. Relaxation exercises and exhalation stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system.
2. Positive thoughts. People who are more optimistic experience less stress.
3. Help yourself and try to find an explanation for yourself when something negative happens. It can help you experience less stress. So what you say to yourself when something happens is crucial to how you feel.
Move on and keep the focus on the road.
Focus on what is important to you on your journey. Where the focus goes, the energy goes!
To rejoice in being on the road. Think about the feeling when you go on vacation, the joy of packing the car, the joy of being on your way through the various destinations on the road. You have an itinerary you follow. Therefore, to have a goal to be happy must have an action plan with different sub-goals that must be implemented for you to achieve
Find out what you have for values, what you truly enjoy doing and what to do to get there. Then you can achieve long-term happiness. Many people achieve their goals, e.g., bought their dream house, new car or a nice jacket they have saved up for.
Once they have the house, car or jacket, they want something new. Happiness only appears for a short time when you can make the purchase, so, in other words, no long-term happiness. Spending money on things only gives short-term happiness.
Comparing yourself to someone else is a threat to how you feel. It's easy to feel miserable and inept if you don't perform as well as your friends around you. It may be to have a worse placement in a competition that allows a person to feel bad (unhappy), but if the person wins the competition, he or she feels great happiness.
As long as the focus is on how you perform, you will only get a brief sense of happiness here. Still, suppose the focus is instead on the path to your performance. In that case, a poor performance for the day can be handled better if you, instead of comparing yourself to others, compare yourself to yourself during the time and the condition you have.
When something makes you feel bad or unhappy, you need to think about how to handle that situation. You may need to refrain from exposing yourself to it. Or train yourself, your attitude and the way you react. It is about your feelings and how you are thinking. Take the joy of others, for example, such as what we often see on social media that can make many people feel bad in believing that everyone else is so much happier, better, richer or whatever.
If we are grateful for what we have or do or are, it is much easier to please others for what they have without feeling miserable ourselves. If happiness can be a way for us to be instead of something we must do to experience, we could feel happy every day.
The attitude you choose to have and the way you think and judge yourself or others is your choice, nobody else's. It is your own responsibility for how you want to be to yourself and to others. It is your choice if you choose to complain about things, whine or criticize.
"if you don't like something, change it, If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain – Maya Angelou
If you would like to listen more to what the researchers say, you can look at https://urplay.se/program/214753-halsans-hemligheter-nyckeln-till-lyckan